But I know that it can't be anything compared to the terrible blows of my poor Jesus. You recall how we prayed together that Jesus would take away every external sign and, see, He has instead added another. Praise be to Jesus. May He be infinitely thanked.
Here we see how the force of Gemma's heart actually pushed outwards three of her ribs near her heart--a fact that was later medically verified at Gemma's exhumation after her death, as stated by Father Germano in his book "The life of St Gemma Galgani".
Now the time came where Jesus began asking her to lay herself upon the cross and be crucified. The letters of 1902 and 1903 tell of this final holocaust. Father Germano commanded her again and again to pray herself back to health, but to no avail. Fr. Germano writes:
|Jesus and the Blessed Virgin Mary|
"Dear daughter, how much pleasing incense you give me."
"Tell your Father that I will give it to you but if he does not take thought of you, I will bring you with me very soon!"
About seeing the Blessed Virgin Mary- From Gemma's Diary:
"I also must say that upon first seeing these things, these figures (that certainly could have been deceptions), I am initially taken with fear; then fear is followed quickly by joy. However that may be, this is what happens to me. I spoke with Her about some of my desires, the most important one being that she should bring me with her to Heaven; this I said to her several times. She answered: "Daughter, you must suffer still more."
"I will suffer up there," I wanted to say, "in Heaven."
"Oh no," was her reply, "in Heaven there is no more suffering; but I will bring you there very soon," She said.
She was near my bed, so beautiful, I contemplated her and could not get enough. I commended my sinner to her; She smiled: that was a good sign ... I further commended to her various persons who were dear to me, in particular those to whom I have a big debt of gratitude. And this I had to do also on the order of my confessor, who last time beseeched me to commend them fervently to Our Lady of Sorrows, saying that I could do nothing for them but that the Blessed Virgin may ask on my behalf and bestow on them every grace.
I feared that She would leave me at any moment and so I called her repeatedly and said She should take me with her. Her presence made me forget about my protector, Brother Gabriel. I asked about him, why hadn't She brought him along, and She said: "Because Brother Gabriel demands more exact obedience from you." She had something to tell me for Father Germano; to these last words She did not answer.
While we were talking together She constantly held my hand, and then She let go; I did not want her to go and I was about to cry; then She said:
"My daughter, that's enough; Jesus wants this sacrifice from you, now it's time for Me to leave you." Her words calmed me and I answered with tranquility: "So be it, the sacrifice is done." She left. Who could describe precisely how beautiful, how beloved is the Heavenly Mother? No, for certain there is no comparison. When will I have the good fortune of seeing Her again?
-St Gemma, pray for us!